Tantra Me Tender


When I first learned about Tantra, I was a mixed up teen with a broken heart and a shattered soul. I’m not sure I ever thought…I want to incorporate Tantra into my life to heal myself, but that is, in essence, what happened. In the beginning I thought that Tantra was about having wild sex for hours on end. Which I did, but still found myself seeking more. Over the years so many people have asked me what it is I “get from Tantra” or why I was drawn to Tantra. The truth is, I don’t have an answer to either of those questions. Not one that is easy to put into words anyways.

Considering the fact that I have never received any specific “Tantra education” from an authentic Tantra teacher, I can’t even say that what I am doing or experiencing is “Tantra”. So within the context of this blog post, I will clarify that when I say Tantra, I am speaking of spiritual connection through sacred rituals, specifically related to compassionate communication and physical pleasure.

With this in mind, the question asked by blog reader Jay becomes “How do I achieve what I seek from compassionate communication and physical pleasure.” That is a question I can answer. To sit in a quiet, aesthetically pleasing room with my lover chatting about nothing in particular brings me a deep level of inner satisfaction. I love sharing myself with my lover and even more so, I enjoy it when my lover shares his innermost thoughts with me.

As for physical pleasure, well let’s just say that receiving and giving sexual, sensual delight is in my nature. What Tantra provided for me was an opportunity to look at sex and sexuality from a different perspective. Instead of simply thinking about the ins and outs of sex, I dove deeper…and explored the how my lover and I could erotically engage each other’s spirits.

When we think about the definition of Spiritual (of, relating to, or affecting the human spirit or soul as opposed to material or physical things.) in relation to sex, there is the possibility for a shift in our approach. When I kiss my lover’s neck, explore the dips and valleys of his body with my tongue, it is my intention to affect his soul not just his body. When my lover penetrates me, I open my soul to him, not just my body.

I would love to hear more about your experiences with Tantra, Spiritual sex, and sacred intimacy.

The Iceman Cometh by Dennis Potakar
The Iceman Cometh by Dennis Potakar








From my heart to yours,




6 Comments Add yours

  1. Some things simply can’t be put into words.

    1. Tantrachick says:

      Too true….;-)

  2. Anil Bhavsar says:

    yes i too fell what you have explained here and it is a very nice felling to be enjoyed life long unbreakable ,continuous constant , merge deep in it


    Anil Bhavsar

    +91-9421392453,9422486963 anilbhavsar10@yahoo.com

  3. jeffstroud says:


    I believe you have expressed the essence of why people are drawn to Tantra, even when it is not called that. Sex in America seems to be something that is passive aggressive, something that is defined as “bad”, “dirty” and “kinky”! That we are not taught healthy expressions of sexuality. That sex is so unconscious. Tantra is the teaching and practice of healthy communication of all senses, body, mind, and spirit.

    Beautifully stated !

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